Great Scott

The bizarre Scott Morrison’s corrupt night flight to Nauru and what followed, an offer the smugglers couldn’t refuse, will be seen, in the twenty-two days before Parliament resumes, as a giant tapeworm devouring him and the Liberal Party.

For his offer is so good the smugglers, our enemies, will wait for him to become the Minister. He is offering, like Howard, a few months’ holiday in tents on Nauru and a life in Australia. Rudd and Burke and Clare and Carr are offering life in PNG among mosquitoes and rapists forever.  Of course our nation’s enemies will wait for their friend Morrison. And the boats, till then, will not come.

They have not come for a week now. They are waiting for Scott’s New Order.

But the more they do not come, the more it will seem that Rudd and Burke and Clare and Carr have stopped them. And that will be, by October 19, election day, the death of the Liberal Party.

For by then their gimcrack broadband, their sabotage of Gonski, their theft of the schoolkids’ money and their hundred billion black hole will be known and famed and execrated. And they will have nowhere to go. Yelling TPVs! and Toll Holdings forever! will not suffice.

And it will go hard with them. No seat in Queensland will be safe now from Katter, Palmer and Labor. Broadband will secure Tasmania for Labor and Wilkie. Bennelong will fall to Jason. And then where will they be?

It will be seen that Scott Morrison — his initials, S and M, suggestive of self-harm as never before — is the Doctor Evatt of the Liberal Party, its mad destroyer.

And the saviour of Labor.


Leave a comment ?


  1. Amongst the PNG attractions of mosquitos and rapes you mention, surely halal pork could be added to the list.

    from The Lonely Planet guide book “Hotspots of Manus Island.”

    “Pigs are not only bred for their meat, but they also represent social values and have even become a status symbol. The more pigs an individual has, the more pigs he can give away, leading to bigger feasts and a higher social status. The killing of pigs is also tied to important events such as cremation, marriage and initiation rites.  Pigs are still the main dowry in exchange for women.”

  2. I didn’t know that Frank - the pig-loving culture I mean.

    • vic, you didn’t know about the pig in PNG culture and diet?

      does that suggest to you that perhaps your’e not quite equipped to assess whether or not Frank’s post is to put it aptly ‘hogwash’?

      you probably have no idea either that PNG is Roman Catholic 27%, Protestant 69.4% (Evangelical Lutheran 19.5%, United Church 11.5%, Seventh-Day Adventist 10%, Pentecostal 8.6%, Evangelical Alliance 5.2%, Anglican 3.2%, Baptist 2.5%, other Protestant 8.9%)

      the islamic takeover is gonna be a tough haul.

  3. Forget about pigs Frank - tents are the future I say!

    How many you want? We got bargains galore!
    Big ones, little ones, green ones, coloured ones, camouflage ones, buy bulk and receive our Liberal government subsidy!
    Fold out ones, peg ones, rod ones, we got ‘em all right here under the one big roof.

    Just ask for Brian or Peta, they’ll look after ya!

    Tell ‘em Ali, Delaram, and the kids sent you!

    This advertorial brought to you by The Liberal Party of Australia, a subsidiary of Toll Holdings.

    • I heard Scott Morrison on SkyNews today say the Coalition Tent City policy on Nauru is going to cost us only $50 Million.

      Thats a lot of money in my book but not compared to the Labor policy which so far is clocking up around $10 Billion according to my mentor Andrew Bolt.

      Rudd wont tell you his price.

      Surely the thrifty Libs who hitch rides to Nauru with Toll Holdings for free can budget down the price on Tents and Fencing.

      How much is razor wire a metre at Bunnings? Anyone know? We could pace out the camp perimeter and do a cost analysis for Rudd to implement on mANUS Island.

      Surely you guys want the best bang for our dollar? The coalition will give you a bargain basement no frills internment camp on the cheap.

      I’m sure the Rudd solution will cost Billions more in comparison. What do you lefties want? A bargain price from Abbott or a lavish Rudd mansion (probably with TV and a gym) for your refugees?

      C’mon put your thinking caps on. Can’t be hard can it?

      • There we go folks! Step right up!
        Everyone’s a winner!

        We got a special deal running this week - bring your tired old piss weak teenage sarcasm, just like Frank’s done here, and you’ll receive, FREE OF CHARGE, a bundle of copper wire to fix that pesky Broadband problem!!

        You cant ask for much better than that folks.
        Shop around, you’ll see this is the best deal running this weekend.
        So come one, come all, down to Brian and Peta’s place where you can pat Frank and grab your tent bargain AND your free bundle of copper wire, normally priced at 1.5 to 3.5 billion a year! but yours today for FREE!!!

        Roll up!
        Roll up!

        Brought to you by The Liberal Party of Australia and their White Knight stockholders Toll Holdings

      • Tell ‘em the price son!

        It would be much cheaper on a cost/benefit analysis to use the Final Solution.

        Gold teeth, spectacles, prayer rugs can be sold and the human waste products - blood and bone - can be used for fertiliser.

        That should appeal to the Rightists.

  4. The more demented and fanatical Morrison becomes the more I find him endearing, the more I like him.

    It is just a matter of weeks before his tongue slips and utters the words “when I’m PM”, in an “All about Eve” moment.

    Bette Davis Abbott vs. Anne Baxter Morrison.

  5. I found Christine Milne also unimpressive on the subject of asylum seekers last night on Late Line.

    Apparently the greens support a regional solution, but PNG is not somehow part of the region, it is a cruel place to send people.

    Apparently there is no limit and a limit at the same time for the numbers to come here.

    The greens support an increase of the refugee intake, there was no acknowledgment of the Labor proposed increase to 26,000.

    She complained that not all of the 3,800 refuges that were supposed to have been airlifted from Indonesia have yet come, (true, this is a failure so far), but she failed to mention that the Greens opposed the Malaysia solution which would have seen 4,000 arrive from the region.

    The Greens also have many policies around population, the environment and the debatable ability of our environment to support large increases in population. I would be interested to hear them articulate clearly how their unlimited/limited refugee driven increase in population gels with their environmental concerns.

    I think the Greens heart is in the right place, but no practical proposals were heard last night.

    • refugee intake is not a significant factor in population growth. Better to aim your questions on this important subject (glad to see the critical issue of world population unsustainability getting attention) to things like Costello’s baby bonus and such like inane/insane approaches

      • Refugee intake is not a significant factor in population growth in Australia yet.

        We both know that with Climate change and increasing population the numbers of people moving around the planet is not going to get any smaller, especially since peace, globally, is not happening any time soon, unfortunately.

        Eventually, in the not too distant future, we are going to have to accept much larger numbers of people, better to plan this in advance IMHO.

        Milne, quite rightly, repeatedly, did say last night that the refugee problem was a global problem and should be handled globally. How? Policy yet to come she said.

        On the other extreme Liberals are saying it is a local issue, we should be able to handle it ourselves they are saying. As brain dead as the baby bonus you mentioned.

    • Deadboofy, I partly hear you. There was a clear distinction between the Greens’ and Labor’s positions, but you have mischaracterized what Milne said. The most significant thing she said was that the boats haven’t stopped; that deterrence has failed. If true, everything she said last night was justified. However, this conflicts with what Bob has said here, that the flow of boats has come to a standstill; that deterrence is working. One of them is exaggerating.

      • The only sure way to stop people from getting on leaky boats is to give them the safe alternative, safe aircraft. That is the Clive Palmer, change the regulation, allow people onto safe aircraft bound for Australia without a visa, and process them here. That is, the very wide open door policy.

        Milne when asked directly, how many we could take, unlimited?, she backed away from that.

        So, under the greens policy, now 30,000 (only 4000 more than what Labor are proposing, but twice as many as the libs) to be processed in Indonesia and then resettled in Australia… will that stop drowning at sea? Probably not. If the processing is not efficient, likely, and even if it is, and we have moved the 30,000 to Australia for that year, what about the rest of them? Boats will more than likely keep coming, and we will be wasting money on defence and border people plucking people out of the sea, rather than spending that money on good things like health and education for Australians and refugees alike.

        I see the big plus in the PNG solution (and possibly Samoa, and any others that may join in a regional approach) is that it provides more space to put desperate people. There are millions of refugees worldwide. The more countries that are willing to help the better. The argument that we are off loading our responsibilities to third world countries is rubbish. We will still be taking heaps of people, there are heaps more. Anywhere that you can get on with your life, work, raise and educate you children, is better than a refugee camp.

  6. Grub Morriscum yelling at Fran this morning was a joy to behold. I hope that she was wearing a face mask as the spittle would have torrential.
    As the Sainted Hunter S said of Humfrey,
    “he sounds & acts like a granny on bad,very bad, speed”.
    The Toll flight was going anyway, that’s why the reptiles of the Oz & he made a charbanc party of it.

  7. .. or even a charabanc

  8. ‘Rudd and Burke and Clare and Carr are offering life in PNG among mosquitoes and rapists forever,’ you say? But Bob, only yesterday you were saying, ‘It looks like paradise to me. Coconuts, parrots, oysters, everything.’

    • Read it carefully.
      Bob is saying that Morisson is saying that Rudd etal are say mosquitoes etc.
      Bob is saying that Morrison is mis-representing Rudd etal, which is true because he is a blatant lier.

  9. I wonder why the Liberals are not marketing their great plans for our schools, universities,health system the environment. They appear to think spewing out their hate filled dog whistling regarding boats and their passengers will get the elected.
    They have a very low opinion of the electorate.

  10. Camp as a row of tents!!

  11. Yea, yea, yea, that’s an oldie.

    Or the Irish sea scout who drowned trying to pitch his tent.

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