They persuaded Fran Kelly not to mention Stafford, where the swing to Labor if duplicated federally would lose the Coalition 87 seats, and to encourage Abbott to say how angry he was that Putin had shot down 38 Australians deliberately and personally.
Abbott rang Putin, presumably to tell him he was under arrest if he came to Brisbane and would be ‘brought to justice’ and was not put through. He then foolishly told his nation he was not put through, thus shrivelling even further his international stature, if any, and railed instead at the Russian Minister for Trade who was in the vicinity.
Julie Bishop rang her Russian opposite number and was not put through either, revealed this to a shocked applauding continent and flew, maintaining her rage, not to the ‘crime scene’ in Ukraine but to a plush office in New York where she drank champagne and yelled that the Russkies were not co-operating, and not returning her calls. This was a little after the Russian-backed Ukraine rebels revealed they were indeed co-operating and, correctly, refrigerating 198 corpses and awaiting the UN inspectors to whom they would give, if asked, the Black Box. Abbott meanwhile went to St Mary’s Cathedral to mourn the 36 Australian dead, none of whom were Catholics, in a town, Sydney, where none of them lived, and thus avoided addressing in Melbourne the AIDS Conference, many of whom were Sapphic atheists and would burn, he believed, like his sister, a billion years in Hell, and, worse, might ask him why he was cancelling AIDS research everywhere in Australia at a moment when, this weekend in St Vincents’ , it seemed near curing HIV.
Campbell Newman said the 20 percent swing against him, which if duplicated in March would lose him 48 seats including his own and leave his successor with only 15, had occurred because he had gritted his teeth and taken ‘hard but necessary decisions’ to fix Labor’s ‘mess’. One of them was to cancel the Premier’s Literary Awards and thus save each grateful taxpayer forty cents a year, another to sack a lot of nurses and ‘privatise’ everything in sight and kill, if he could, the Barrier Reef. He would win back everybody’s confidence, he swore, by shrieking louder in his famed military manner and privatising even more things, a policy which had lost many governments office in all the states, and, riding on the back of Tony Abbott’s popularity, prevail in March.